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SIDS of Pennsylvania - Support Information | |||||||
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What Do We Need During Grief?
Time- Time alone and time with others whom you trust and who will listen when you need to talk. Months and years of time to feel and understand the feelings that go along with loss.
Rest-Relaxation-Exercise-Nourishment-Diversion- You may need extra amounts of things you needed before. Hot baths, afternoon naps, a trip, a "cause" to work for to help others--any of these may give you a lift. Grief is an exhausting process, emotionally. You need to replenish yourself. Follow what feels healing to you and what connects you to the people and things you love.
Security- Try to reduce or find help for financial or other stresses in your life. Allow yourself to be close to those you trust. Getting back into routine helps. You may need to allow yourself to do things at your own pace.
Hope- You may find hope and comfort from those who have experienced a similar loss. Knowing some things that helped them, and realizing that they have "recovered" and that time does help, may give you hope that sometime in the future your grief will be less raw and painful.
Caring- For a while, it will seem that much of life is without "meaning". At times like these, small goals are helpful.
Something to look forward to, like playing tennis with a friend next week, a movie tomorrow night, a trip next month helps you get through the time in the immediate future. Living one day at a time, is a rule of thumb. At first, don't be surprised if your enjoyment of these things isn't the same. This is normal. As time passes, you may need to work on some longer range goals to give some structure and direction to your life. You may need guidance or counseling to help with this.
Small Pleasures- Do not underestimate the healing effects of small pleasures, as you are ready. Sunsets, a walk in the woods, a favorite food--all are small steps in regaining pleasure in life itself.
Permission to backslide- Sometimes after a period of feeling good, we find ourselves back in the old feelings of extreme sadness, despair, or anger. This is often the nature of grief, up and down, and it may happen over and over for quite a time. It happens because as humans, we cannot take in .ill of the pain and the meaning of death, all at once. So we let it in a little at a time.
Drugs Are Not Helpful- Even medication used to help people get through periods of shock, under a physicians guidance, may. prolong and delay the necessary process of grieving. We cannot prevent or Cure grief. The only way Out is Through.
S.I.D.S. of Pennsylvania
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©2006 S.I.D.S. of Pennsylvania Suite 250 Riverfront Place - 810 River Avenue - Pittsburgh, PA 15212 412-322-5680 or 800-PA1-SIDS (800-721-7437)
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